Friday, March 3, 2017

Finding Happiness in Recovery

Finding Happiness in Recovery

Sobriety Can Be Fun
Finding Happiness in Recovery

Sad, depressed, bored. That’s how many “normal” people think recovering addicts must feel. This, actually, couldn’t be farther from the truth. Anyone who visits an AA meeting or meets a former addict who is active in the recovery community might be in for a pleasant surprise. Recovering addicts and alcoholics are “not a glum lot,” as they say in The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. They are happy, content, and have found new, profound meaning in their lives.

addiction recovery can mean happy and meaningful livesThat’s not to say that everything is rainbows and unicorns for recovered alcoholics. Trials and hardships are a part of everyone’s life. The difference is that people in active recovery have tools for coping and a support system that helps them through the tough times. As one recovering addict said, “It’s too bad everyone doesn’t have AA. The 12 steps and the fellowship make for a beautiful way of life.”




Here are some of the reasons people in recovery find happiness:


1. Recovering addicts have been to “hell and back”:

Sobriety and addiction recovery gratitudeAddiction is a fatal disease. It takes away everything that matters most in life: health, relationships, a way to make a living, and any sense of self-worth. If someone is able to escape the relentless cycle of addiction, he or she is immensely grateful to be alive. Once someone is willing to “do the work,” namely going to AA meetings and doing the 12 steps, wonderful things begin to happen.
Relationships heal, health returns, and opportunities reveal themselves. Addicts quickly learn how to deal with emotions, work towards personal improvement, and behave with honesty and integrity in all their affairs. In essence we get a “crash course” in life. The pain of the past becomes a doorway to personal strength and spiritual growth.


2. Fellowship and community offer strength and guidance.

Addiction is a disease of isolation. Nearly all of us have cut ourselves off from friends and family in the final days of our addiction. Alcoholics Anonymous offers companionship, openness, and mentorship to those of us who formerly felt alone in the world.

drug and alcohol addiction fellowshipThe companionship experienced in AA meetings can give us the comfort we missed while in our addiction. “Going to AA meetings with all those happy shiny people was really hard for me at first,” relates one woman, “but after a while I started looking forward to seeing my new friends.”As someone becomes more comfortable in AA meetings, they often feel a camaraderie and kinship they haven’t felt in a long time.

Also, the policy of open sharing in AA meetings can be cathartic as we learn to express our feelings. We are sharing emotions and thoughts with people who understand and have been where we are. The fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous can become like group therapy. “This is the best deal in town,” relates one AA member. “It’s way cheaper than my shrink and it works much faster!”

Finally, the concept of sponsorship in Alcoholics Anonymous provides us with personal guidance and support. A sponsor becomes your personal guide through the 12 Steps and is there to lend an ear when you need to talk. You are supported by someone who understands what its like to be at the mercy of drug or alcohol addiction and has come out at the other side. When we have a sponsor, we learn to ask for help when we need it. This is a wonderful practice in the outside world as well.



3. We learn that giving is the key

One of the main tenets of recovery is helping others. A great deal of freedom comes from doing the 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. The final step is to help those who also want to quit drinking or doing drugs. We give others the chance that we were given by sponsoring newcomers, giving rides, doing service work, helping in any way we can.

sobriety helping others
Helping others makes us happy as well. This works in many ways. First of all, when helping others, we can “get out of our own head.” Focusing on the needs of someone else diverts out attention from the things that might be bothering us. Also, working with newcomers can make our recovery more powerful. As we relate to those who are new, we see how much we have grown and are immensely grateful and more resolved to stay sober. For many, working to help other alcoholics and addicts is the first time they feel a sense of purpose and meaning in life. The things they were missing most of their lives come to them when they shift their attention away from their own problems.


4. Acceptance of the things we cannot change


Acceptance helps recovery sobriety

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.

This is the Serenity Prayer, which is spoken at the beginning of every AA meeting.
For many, acceptance of what is RIGHT NOW in life is at the core of happiness and serenity. This concept is integral to many Eastern philosophies like Buddhism and Taoism. Modern spiritual teachers like Eckhart Tolle and Deepak Choprah also stress the importance of acceptance. We stop trying to change external circumstances and control events and other people. The things that people in recovery try to change are internal, like character flaws and response to stress. Many have found that when the way they look at events and situations changes, their feelings about external situations change. Perception really does determine experience, and it all begins with acceptance.


5. Freedom from the past...and the future

sobriety happiness in the present moment
In recovery, one of the first things we learn is to release the future. Sayings like “just for today” and “one day at a time” reiterate that recovery is accomplished in a succession of small steps. Looking at an unknown future can be daunting, but nearly everyone can hold on for one day, or even, at first, one hour. After a while, we accumulate some sober time and learn that the “one day at a time” perspective can be useful when facing other obstacles in life. We learn that worrying about events in the future doesn’t really help the outcome and just adds unnecessary stress. Facing problems incrementally allows us to stay level-headed and focused.
Active recovery can free someone from the past too. The 12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous help the individual look at their resentments, fears, patterns of behavior and guilt for past actions. Once someone has started step 9, they are actively facing the things they did for their past and making amends to those harmed. Although this sounds scary, the feeling of release is immense. They are no longer bound to the past and can use their energy to be the person they want to be. We experience a “new freedom and a new happiness,” as the Big Book promises.

We are not alone in recovery sobriety
In conclusion, we see that recovering addicts can be as happy or even happier than “normal” people. A sense of purpose, community and support come with the fellowship with others who have been to the depths of addiction. We, who have been isolated and desperate, are no longer alone. Also, by doing the 12 steps, we learn to “clean house” and face life with a new perspective. As we make patient spiritual and emotional progress, our feeling of usefulness and self-worth grows. Many in recovery feel that they are “the lucky ones.” We are given a new way of life far better than anything we could have imagined. Our past, however painful, becomes our greatest gift.

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Enjoying the Holidays in Recovery


The holidays can be an emotional time for anybody, especially if you are in early sobriety. Expectations, parties and time spent with family are situations particularly trying when you are establishing new patterns of behavior in recovery. How do you act at a party? What if someone offers you a drink? These are a few of the issues you may face as the holiday season approaches. Don’t worry, though. If you plan ahead and follow these tips, the holidays can be a joyous time free from drugs or alcohol.
Take care of yourself
Make sure you eat consciously and get enough rest during this time. Get plenty of exercise and take time to relax. Positive choices for your health lead to emotional health as well.
Have a plan
If you are going to a gathering where there will be alcohol, have an exit strategy. Have a place to go after the party. Perhaps an AA meeting or a visit with a friend after the party will be just what you need. Find a safe place to go and just breathe. Let a sober friend know you may be calling them. If you feel stressed or pressured, a friendly voice can make a world of difference. Give yourself a curfew. Share your plan with others before you go.
Stay grateful
What things, large or small, are better about your life now that you are sober? Do you have new friends? Closer relationships with your family? Do you feel better physically? A written gratitude list can bolster your resolve to stay sober.
Try new things
If the traditional things you do during the holidays are triggers for you, try doing something different. Go to a movie. Go ice-skating. Volunteer to help others in need. New behavior patterns can strengthen new thinking.
Bring a sober friend
Having a sober companion is one of the best ways to face social situations where there may be alcohol. Your common goal and accountability will make you both stronger in the face of temptation.
It’s okay to tell others you are in recovery
If you are pressured by your friends, it’s alright to tell them you are in recovery and can’t drink. You may be pleasantly surprised at their support and understanding. Practice what you are going to say so you’ll feel comfortable with your message.
Hold a non-alcoholic drink
If you have a glass in your hand like everybody else you will feel more comfortable. Others are less likely to offer you alcohol too.
You don’t have to go!
Know your limits. If going to the party or gathering is just too stressful right now, don’t go. People will understand. Put your sobriety first.
Dance! Mingle! Have fun!
Just because you aren’t drinking doesn’t mean you can’t still have fun. You may find that these situations can be even more fun sober. Plus, there will be no hangover!
Help others
There is always someone else who needs help around this time. Volunteer at a soup kitchen. Give a ride to someone who is newly sober. Wash dishes at the party. If you can focus on others, you will think less about drugs or alcohol.
Spend lots of time with other people
Avoid isolation. Time spent with sober friends or family will calm your thoughts and keep you accountable for your actions.
Offer to be the designated driver.
Stay safe by keeping others safe.

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Women and Alcoholism: The Hidden Killer



Men drink more than women, so alcohol abuse is a man’s problem. Right?
Well, if you are talking about men and women born around 1900, you would be right. According to the Huffington Post, “Men born between 1891 and 1910 were three times more likely to have an alcohol use problem compared to women born at the same time.” That perception has survived the last 100 years.
But that’s not the case anymore. When it comes to binge drinking and alcoholism, women are, sadly, closing the gap….especially young women. Women born between 1991 and 2000 drink nearly as much as men. Today, males drink only 10% more than women. An alarming trend among women is the number that engage in binge drinking. Binge drinking is defined as drinking 4 or more alcoholic beverages in quick succession. This type of drinking among women jumped 30% between 1979 and 2006. Women are drinking dangerous quantities as well. According to the Wall Street Journal, “Between 1999 and 2008, the number of young women who showed up in emergency rooms for being dangerously intoxicated rose by 52%. The rate for young men, though higher, rose just 9%.”

So, is alcoholism really a problem among women?



As women continually break down barriers in society, one would think these statistics shouldn’t be cause for alarm. But they would be wrong. The plain fact is that women metabolize liquor differently. According to the NIAAA, women have more fat and less water in their bodies. Women also lack some of the enzyme levels that men have to break down alcohol. Therefore, women are affected by alcohol more quickly. The effects of alcohol linger in the woman’s body longer as well. Because of this, even moderate drinking among women can cause a variety of health risks. A lower amount of body water and different enzyme makeup means alcohol-related problems occur at lower drinking levels in women.

Women who drink are more likely than men to develop the health risks of alcoholism, and much more quickly.

  • Liver damage: Women are more likely to develop liver diseases such as hepatitis and cirrhosis. Some believe estrogen accelerates this process.
  • Brain damage: Certain regions of the female brain have been shown to shrink after prolonged alcohol abuse. Alcohol-induced brain damage occurs far less in men.
  • Heart disease: Women are just as likely as men to get heart disease, even though they consume only 60% as much liquor in their lifetimes.
  • Breast cancer: Heavy drinking among women drastically increases the risk of breast cancer.
  • Violent injury: Alcoholic women are more likely to be physically assaulted than alcoholic men. Also, among heavy drinkers, a higher proportion of women are involved in fatal car crashes than men.
  • Death: A recent study in Germany has found that alcoholic fatality is twice as likely among women.

Adding to the problem, the healthcare industry hasn’t yet caught up to the trend. The early symptoms of liver damage and heart disease can be overlooked by professionals because they don’t usually suspect heavy drinking among women.

So, what options are available for a woman with a drinking problem? Certainly the same that are available to men, but there are perceived obstacles there as well. Women are less likely to reach out for help for a number of reasons. A lack of social support and the stigma of alcoholism in women can make many keep their drinking a secret. Childcare and obligations at work and home make treatment at a facility seem impossible. Fortunately, there are ways around these obstacles. Time taken away from the normal schedule for treatment and healing should be encouraged in the family. The lives of these women and their families hang in the balance.

Many would agree that these facts are chilling. We have wrongly assumed that men are far more likely to become alcoholics when the truth is quite the contrary. Women are drinking more than ever and suffering the negative health effects of alcohol abuse far more quickly. The stigma of alcoholism is keeping women from asking for help and getting the treatment they need and the number of alcoholic women continues to grow. 5.3 million American women drink in quantities that threaten their health and safety. Four million of them are dependent on alcohol and cannot quit. Yes, times have definitely changed. Likewise, society needs to make changes in our attitudes and healthcare protocol to save the lives of our mothers, wives, daughters and sisters.

Reference:


Thursday, October 13, 2016


I was looking for SOBER but I found RECOVERY
by RB


When I first started this new phase of my life, I did not know that it was going to bring me to a place that I had searched for my entire life. I simply went to rehab because I thought I needed help with a substance abuse issue. Once I got here, I started to realize that my issue was not substance abuse. This was just a symptom of my issues with life. Before rehab, I was alone, I did not understand my purpose in life, and I could not see how I could make my life better. When I finally got to a place where I was willing to accept help, I started to listen to people that I could see were living the way I wanted to live, and my life slowly got better. I asked for help to get sober, and in that help I found Recovery.

Even when in a crowd of people, I felt alone. From the time I woke up each day, I was always trying to find a way to escape this feeling of not being a part of daily life. Even after times of great fun with friends, I would immediately get home and start to feel that feeling of being by myself. Most of the time when I was having fun, it would be overshadowed by so much fear that it would come to an end and I would not be able to enjoy the moment because I was obsessed with being alone. The program at Ventura Recovery Center helped me to learn to escape that loneliness, and become present in my daily life. Recovery has taught me not to be afraid of the end of a time of fun because I know there will be more fun in the future.

Before I started this process, I thought my purpose was simply to accumulate stuff, and fill up my life with things that I thought would make me happy. Money, Cars, Clothes, Homes-none of these made me happy. Once I had acquired my next dream item, I would always have to move on to the next thing. I would not be able to be happy with what I had. I always needed more, and no matter what I got the empty feeling just came right back. When I got into Recovery, all of this changed. I started to work with others, and seeing my Recovery in them helped me to gain a respect for my life, and a real purpose that was not related to anything I own.

Being at a point of not knowing where to go, what to do, how to make my life better. My only option was to ask for help. I always thought that asking for help was a sign of weakness, but now that I look back it was one of the most courageous points in my life. Admitting that I did not have all the answers, and could not think my way out of the desperate situation that had become my life was the only way that I could get to the point where I am now. When I asked for help, the cavalry I expected showed up. They did not look like I expected, but that did not matter. They did exactly what was needed to help me change my life.

I started the process to simply get sober, and through it I found Recovery. To me, Recovery means waking up with a sense of purpose every day, being a part of a community that cares about me as a person, and helping others find solutions to live life. I came to rehab to get sober, and I found a solution to the problems that had plagued me all my life. I am not alone, I have purpose, and my life is better. I never thought this would happen, but it did. I am so glad I wanted to get sober, because that was the catalyst that helped me stumble into Recovery, and find a new way to live.

This article was sent to us by RB, who came to us looking for help and became a much-loved member of the VRC family.

Tuesday, September 20, 2016


Heroin and Opioid Awareness Week (Sept. 18th - 24th)

In a National deadly heroin and opioid addiction epidemic, it has been announced that September 18th- September 24th will be Heroin and Opioids Epidemic Awareness Week. The number of deaths related to overdoses is truly devastating. Too many lives are lost due to heroin addiction, and we need to put a stop to it. 
In just 6 years, heroin and opioid related deaths have increased by 244%. The abuse and addiction of this horrible drug addiction has taken lives at an all-time high speed. According to the national statistics, every day heroin and pharmaceutical opioids take lives of about 78 people nationwide.
Opioids are often prescribed to act as a pain reliever by blocking the receptors of the nerves of the brain and spinal cord. When taken longer than prescribed, the person becomes addicted to the pills and sometimes moves onto heroin.
Many of these opioids don’t only come from pharmacies but are often sold on the streets, “In 2012, over five percent of the U.S. population aged 12 years or older used opioid pain relievers non-medically.”
A family of most common opioids used are Oxycodone – a semi synthetic drug which includes Tylox®, Percodan®, and OxyContin®. It is derived from a poppy plant and is highly addicting.
Fentanyl – which has taken lives of many famous people, is a powerful synthetic opioid that is similar to morphine but is 80-100 times more potent. Fentanyl comes in a prescription form also known as Actiq®, Duragesic®, and Sublimaze®. Street names for fentanyl or for fentanyl-laced heroin include Apache, China Girl, China White, Dance Fever, Friend, GoodFella, Jackpot, Murder 8, TNT, and Tango and Cash. “Many users believe that they are purchasing heroin and actually don’t know that they are purchasing fentanyl – which often results in overdose deaths.” Clandestinely-produced fentanyl is primarily manufactured in Mexico.
Heroin – an opiate drug processed from morphine and extracted from certain poppy plants. It comes in a white or brown powder, or black sticky form knows as “black tar heroin”.
Heroin is laced with other substances and an unaware user isn’t quite sure how much heroin is actually being injected, smoked or even snorted, and often ends in an overdose. Known names for heroin - Big H, Black Tar, Chiva, Hell Dust, Horse, Negra, Smack, Thunder.
“According to data compiled by NHTSA, 63 percent of the 21,798 drivers who were killed in motor vehicle crashes in 2009 were tested for drugs. Of these, 3,952 tested positive for drug involvement, representing 18 percent of the total for that year. The report also showed drug use reported by the states among fatally injured drivers increasing from 13 percent in 2005, to 15 percent in 2006, 16 percent in 2007, and 18 percent in 2008.”

Thursday, September 15, 2016


Dr Silkworth's Alcoholic Allergy: Fact or Fiction?

Historically, alcoholics have been viewed as weak, simply lacking the willpower to curb their drinking and live a normal life. Alcoholics were considered  “maladjusted to life, ...in full flight from reality, or ...outright mental defectives.(1)” Luckily, with the release of  The “Big Book” of Alcoholics Anonymous in 1939, our perception of alcoholism started to change. “Doctor’s Opinion” is a pivotal chapter in Alcoholics Anonymous in which Dr. William Silkworth proposed that “The body of the alcoholic is quite as abnormal as his mind.”(2) . After treating countless alcoholics in his career, Dr. Silkworth observed that alcoholics physically reacted differently to alcohol than normal people. He said We believe...that the action of alcohol on these chronic alcoholics is a manifestation of an allergy; that the phenomenon of craving is limited to this class and never occurs in the average temperate drinker.”(3)This theory, that alcoholics were physically different than their fellows, has survived since those early days in 1939.


While the mental aspects of alcoholism are widely accepted, the “allergy” theory has been debated for decades. An allergy is defined as an abnormal immune response to a foreign substance. Many say there is no physical evidence of an allergy in alcoholics. The telltale signs like rashes, inflammation, or even anaphylaxis are missing. Many say the alcoholic allergy theory is illogical, inconsistent with what is known about allergies, and completely lacks any scientific supporting evidence.”(4) But what if the actual craving for alcohol is the allergic response? Or, perhaps more importantly, should we focus more on the alcoholic’s unique physiological response to alcohol rather than what this response is called?



In recent years, research has shown that the body of an alcoholic truly responds to alcohol differently than that of a normal person. According to the National Institute On Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, alcohol use and alcohol-related problems are influenced by individual variations in alcohol metabolism, or the way in which alcohol is broken down and eliminated by the body.(5) When alcohol enters the system, it is broken down by enzymes from the pancreas and the liver so the body can process it. First, the enzymes break the alcohol down into acetaldehyde. More enzymes turn the acetaldehyde into diacetic acid. From there, more enzymes turn diacetic acid into acetate. One theory postulates that It is at this phase that the normal person differs from the alcoholic.


Acetate has been proven to produce cravings for more acetate, especially in alcoholics. One study states that the glucose metabolism levels in the brain are lower in a heavy drinker while the acetate uptake is higher. The alcoholic “brain may rely on acetate as an alternate energy source during alcoholic intoxication and...a history of heavy alcohol consumption may facilitate this switch to acetate use.” (6) In short, consistent heavy drinking may change the way the brain processes energy. Thus, the brain craves more acetate to sustain itself.


The time span that acetate lingers in the system is the critical difference between the alcoholic and the temperate drinker. In a normal person, acetate is converted to sugar, water and carbohydrates at a rate of about an ounce an hour. Once this conversion occurs, the effects of acetate are neutralized. The normal drinker can stop after one or two drinks because the acetate has metabolized and causes no craving. In an alcoholic, this process is much slower. The acetate is metabolized three to ten times more slowly. So if a normal person breaks down one ounce of acetate in an hour, the alcoholic body could take 3-10 hours to metabolize the same amount. The acetate lingering in the system triggers cravings for more acetate (from alcohol) and each drink intensifies the effect. This makes it impossible for the alcoholic to stop drinking after the first or second drink.


In light of these facts, we can safely conclude that Dr. Silkworth was correct. While the use of the term “allergy” has been refuted, the scientific evidence that there is definitely a unique physiological response in alcoholics remains the same. The alcoholic is truly mentally and physically different than normal, temperate drinkers. As scientists have stated, the process by which the body filters alcohol renders the alcoholic helpless against the cravings begun with that first drink. And, as there is no medical cure, the only way for an alcoholic to combat the ruthless cycle of craving and addiction is to abstain completely from alcohol. As Dr. Silkworth put it, “These allergic types can never safely use alcohol in any form at all(7)” In other words, an alcoholic can never take that first drink if he or she wants to recover.
(1)(Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001, p. xxvi)
(2)(Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001, p. xxvi)
(3)(Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001, p. xxviii)
(4)Hanson, Ph.D. Prof. David J. "Is Alcoholism an Allergy to Alcohol?" Is Alcoholism an Allergy to Alcohol? N.p., n.d. Web. 08 Sept. 2016.
(7)(Alcoholics Anonymous, 2001, p. xxviii)